34 weeks and the things people say

So let me tell you a little something about myself… I’m 5’3″. And I’m carrying my baby ALL in front. I absolutely love being pregnant, but with me being short, and a belly that is growing perfectly horizontal, this week has brought some unwelcomed remarks. And really, it started only this past week. I’m currently at the stage that my little man is packing on half a pound a week. (Chub on little man!) And my belly is growing at an alarming rate with him. With all the self-esteem smashing comments I’ve received this past week, I thought I’d write a little guide for you.

What you should NEVER say to a pregnant woman: (and the things I wish I had the guts to say back.)

• Are you sure you’re not having twins? (You know, I’m not. The ultrasound technician seemed a little drunk the last time we checked.)
• YOU have gotten so big since that last time I saw you two days ago! (I haven’t been able to put down the cupcakes.)
• When are you due? Yesterday? (You are correct. I’m over due now… And then as the weeks go by watch them feel really bad for me.)
• Duuuude. You look like you’re going to pop. (I am. Please step a little closer to me.)
• You look soooo big. (Really? I actually haven’t gained any weight during my pregnancy. My doctor is very concerned.)
• Do you use your belly as a desk? (Yes. And also as a weapon.)

This is all in good fun. I know people mean well. I know I’m huge. It just gets a little wearing when almost everyone you talk to reminds you of your size. I did enjoy this moment though…My parents have been out of town for about a month, and last night I saw them for the first time since they left. When I walked thru the door, both sets of eyes bulged out of their heads and  they both said “Wow!” at the same time. I read a couple days ago that women who were larger babies tend to give birth to babies that are also large. I was ten pounds. Heaven help me.

Alright ladies, what horrible remark did you get over and over while you were pregnant?